Anyone who knows me knows I am
absent-minded. Yesterday, for at least the thousandth time (a very conservative
estimate!) in our almost 49 years of marriage, I heard Diane say, “You forgot
to turn off the stove burner again…” Over the years, the tone in her voice when
she says that has changed. It used to be tainted with incredulity at my
repeated offenses and annoyance at my apparent lack of repentance and effort to
reform my delinquent ways. What I now hear in her voice as she repeats the same
refrain is often resignation mixed with a faint lingering hope that it may
still one day sink into my very thick skull. This latent pyromaniacal tendency
is only one of the many flaws in my personality Diane has had to adapt to.
People are flawed. They have ticks, habits,
inclinations, ideas that can drive the most even-tempered person up the wall. I
used to try to “fix” flawed people so that they would conform to my criteria of
“normalcy”. I am less inclined to do
that now, although the temptation to do so is still there. Not only am I more
tolerant of flaws in others, but I have come to realize that these shortcomings
are Trojan horses carrying not enemies to be feared, but wonderful gifts to welcome
and cherish. The real or perceived deficiencies I see in others are always an
invitation and an opportunity to grow in patience, forbearance, compassion, forgiveness, and love.
Aren’t flawed people wonderful!
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