Great Opportunities!

 Sandy came to me with tears in her eyes and anger in her voice. Unkind words had been exchanged between her and a few of the other girls in my class. Her pride had been hurt and she was intent on obtaining swift justice for the wrong she had suffered. As a teacher with authority and power, I was to punish the culprit. Vengeance, she hoped, would be swift and painful for her aggressors.

I knew Sandy very well and also knew that the girls with whom she was now upset were her friends the day before and would be so again the next day. Sandy had a strong personality, and I was certain that no real damage had been done to her self-esteem. What was really needed from me was not justice but something quite different.

After listening carefully to what she had to say, I looked at her with a big grin on my face and exclaimed with exuberance, "Aren't you lucky! Not everybody is given such a great opportunity. Wow! These girls have given you the opportunity to forgive them. Isn't that great!"

This happened many years ago, but I can still vividly recall the look on her face. It alternated in quick succession from consternation, to puzzlement, to a smile (was she not the bearer of a great opportunity! - a Good News!), and back to consternation again.

I do not know whether Sandy was so confused by my statement that she simply forgot about her anger or whether she understood something, but by the end of the day she and her former "enemies" were friends once again.

No, I am not advocating for submission when faced with abuse or injustice, but an offense is not only something that calls for redress, it is also a doorway to a deeper love: an invitation to "be merciful as your Heavenly Father is merciful."

"We must develop and maintain the capacity to forgive.
He who is devoid of the power to forgive is devoid of the power to love." - Martin Luther King, Jr.